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I hear Internet Explorer 10 is going to allow you to download and install Firefox up to three times faster.
i just accidentally used AOL online, im betting the workers there are celebrating and think they have a chance in the future. lol
Cop: do you know why I pulled you over? Me: pfft. I could think of like fifty reasons, I’m not falling for that.
For years I thought hitchhikers were just complimenting my driving.
Put glitter on top of all your friends ceiling fans blades........... Wait till summer... Enjoy!
I have a life, I have the best life in the world. Oh wait sitting around watching Netflix and eating pizza rolls isn`t a life. I guess i was wrong then. :( bummer
There is no better indication of how drunk you are than how loudly you declare that you`re not.
I like when videogames limit how many things you can hold. "You have 100 items in an invisible bag. Carrying another would be unrealistic"
Someone asked me how much love was worth and I couldn’t answer because alimony is calculated differently in each state.
When I`m in an elevator with a stranger I generally hold their hand to let them know that they`re safe
What is an Amish girls favourite fantasy? Two Mennonite
My coworkers and I do this fun thing where they say `It`s so cold out!` and I say `It`s winter` and then we silently hate each other.
Having a dog around pretty much denies any opportunity to take advantage of the 5 second rule
Men wear the pants in the relationship but women control the zipper.
Sometimes when I’m feeling lonely, I head on over to Best Buy and pretend to know nothing about my phone.