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I really need a long road trip, top down, in the Jeep...with a cooler....loud music....and an extra cooler in case the first one isn`t enough
You look over-medicated. What`s your doctor`s name?
My brain is giving me the silent treatment today.
Ya, Wednesday sucks but… it could be Monday!
"Grapey." -me after every wine at the wine-tasting
Stupidity should be painful...really!!!
I’m bored enough to clean.
Who named them veterinarians and not "dogtors"?
Takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do ...
So bored at work I can`t even think of something to goggle
was going to argue with you...but then I remembered I really didn`t care
My grandfather once waited in line for 36 hours to get a loaf of bread and I can`t wait two seconds for a Youtube video to load.
Life hack: If you keep your mouth shut, no one will know you`re so stupid
You know you are meant to be when you high five after sex.
When someone says "Happy New Years" I wonder, how many years are they talking about?