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Still not 100% clear on whether French Montana is a person or a steakhouse special.
People who text back... "kk" ... Are so annoying! ....and almost racist
I’m great at remembering names. I just don’t remember which one’s yours.
It`s scientifically proven the more you shut up then the less likely I am to punch you in the face.
The worst thing about rich people is I`m not one of them.
Never call a woman crazy because she will say, “I’m not crazy!” and then go and do something crazy. Probably with matches.
Orion`s Belt is a huge waist of space.
I read somewhere that we only use 10% of our brains. I wonder what the other half is for?
Sometimes my life feels like a 40 year long episode of Punk`d...
I wish I could select all my responsibilities and press delete.
With names like "Batman" and "Robin", you`d think they could fly...
I’m glad you spent $80 on makeup to look like a $5 whore. Well done
Running behind is my cardio.
I don’t have a bucket list, but my f*cket list is a mile long.
Crazy is not a destination, it is a way of life.