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Sometimes, I like to stalk random strangers vacation pic`s, and tag myself as one of the people in the background just for laughs.
You have a point. It`s just not very sharp
It`s almost Valentines Day and I still don`t know what to get myself yet.
I do 5 sit-ups every morning. No, it doesn`t sound like much, but there`s only so many times you can press the snooze button.
Seems like we would be just fine with about half as many types of pasta
Pirates that used X to mark the spot were stupid. If they had used a G, nobody would ever have found their treasure.
I went to Jared for my girlfriend`s Christmas gift. I`m sure she will love her Subway gift card.
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember all the things I was suppose to do.
Sometimes a special someone walks right into your life and helps you realize how much better your life was before they walked into it.
The people who make medicine clearly have no idea what fruit tastes like
Was up all night wondering, why do people compliment me for having all my sh!t together & yet still insult me for being full of it?
Studies show it’s totally okay for me to just say “studies show” in front of whatever I want to say.
Who ever snuck the s in "fast food" was a clever little bastard!
To any ex-military that live on my street I apologize for whatever messages we may be sending, 2yo has discovered light switches
So there`s a t.v. show called, It`s Me or the Dog?.. I was disappointed to find out its not a game show where people guess who farted