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I was thinking earlier, thats all, just wanted everyone to know that it does happen from time to time........
Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
If these people don’t start giving better advice, I’m no longer going to allow them in my head.
No heel is too high when pointed up at the ceiling.
As long as there is an open textbook in front of you, nobody will question what you are doing on your laptop.
My head says go to the gym. My heart says food.
My friends always use to say, "there`s plenty of fish in the sea." But looks like I ignored their advice and ended up marrying a whale.
Ever look in a mirror wondering about the stranger staring back & then realize it`s your neighbor`s window and they`re calling the cops?
Insanity does not run in my family. It strolls through, taking it`s time and getting to know each one of us personally.
The fact that you don’t find me amazing doesn’t bother me at all, it just confirms what I have suspected all along; that you have bad taste.
That tenth doctor is a selfish idiot, he never recommends anything!
Taco Tuesday sends a terrible message to our nation`s children. They need to know that tacos are always an option no matter what day it is.
Pizza doesn’t ask questions. Pizza understands.
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted.
Scariest Moment: Flushing the toilet at someone else’s house, and seeing the water rise…