Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Make somebody happy today... mind your own business!!!
Two days is not enough time for a weekend.
The only difference between fear and adventure is how much you breathe.
Never judge a man ’till you’ve driven a mile with his wife.
You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks you what you like to do for fun.
Maybe cologne should come with a two sprays a day lock on it.
In the United States a man gets kicked in the groin every 6.2 seconds. I would hate to be that man.
The early bird catches the worm. And the late bird catches one of the other trillion worms left. What`s your point?
Nipples (noun) - the body`s way of telling you the weather
Women have to deal with periods, pregnancy, childbirth, menopause and hot flashes. Men have to deal with women.
There are 2 kinds of people: 1) Happy morning people 2) Cranky morning people that fantasize about killing the happy morning people
I have never met a woman without wondering what her box of cookie recipes looks like.
Call me old school, but cigarettes should not have USB ports
Depression is wanting to lay down and realizing that you are already laying down.
Do you like the strong, silent type? Then you`ll love my farts.