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They say the key to a fitness routine is having a workout buddy and that`s why I surround myself with lazy people
Texting "Good Morning, Beautiful" will change a girl`s whole day. If you time it right, it will do the same for her boyfriend.
Remember when there was more important crap to do besides Facebook all day? Me neither.
If you`re reading this then I`m wishing you a Happy New Year! Stay safe, have fun, and remember, I like New Years gifts too!
"I`m $50 away from getting free shipping which is only $5 and what I want is $12 so I need to spend $38 more to save money." -my brain
If I throw a stick will you leave?
Roughly 82% of my day is trying to decide what my next meal will be
Sometimes I post crazy shit just to see if my friend`s list will drop a few #`s
I`m doing the KFC Bucket Challenge!
Just a friendly reminder, there are a minimum of three spiders in your room at all times. Goodnight...
When something goes wrong in your life, just yell "PLOT TWIST!" and move on.
It`s funny how many people I have in my phones contact list who all have the same name Do Not Answer.
I bet when spiders see those fake green cob webs on Halloween they must be like "Ugh, tourists".
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...
If House of Cards has taught me anything it’s that I need a friend who owns a rib place.