Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. Im pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
If I was rich, I`d do nothing all day from a much nicer couch
BEST PICK UP LINE: You would probably sleep better tonight if we had sex.
Two Best Advices For Safe Life : 1. Always Speak The Truth, No Matter How Bitter Harsh It Is ... 2. Run Immediately After Saying It..
I hate when Iยดm laughing & my a$$ falls off.
Please respect the revolving door speed that has already been established.
Ok everybody. Please look in your bedroom closet. I got my stalking notes mixed up and don`t know where I am.
Jack daniel was found dead by johnie walker at castle strt under savanna tree,captain morgan believed dat he was killed by strongbow.his 4cuzns said that he was best in j&b club at knights...
Some people never go crazy...... What truly horrible lives they must live
I`ve been on a diet for 2 weeks and all I`ve lost is 14 days.
My road to success is under construction and all the workers are out getting sh!tfaced.
Did you know you can buy live lobsters? Anyway, can I use your shower mine is full of lobsters.
I think my new Stress Management plan is going to be alcoholism.
Well, well, well. Guess who the grocery store clerk asked to come back soon?
At the end of each day, life should ask us, `Do you want to save the changes?`