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Shouldn`t there have been at least one scene in The Karate Kid where Daniel`s mom was like "Why are you constantly in that old man`s shed?"
"I really should buckle down and get my rap album going"-Me, every time I drink
No matter how old you are ... swingsets are cool.
If you speak too slowly, I will complete all your sentences in my mind in ways that makes your story much more interesting
I didn`t see anyone important yesterday, so I`ll probably wear these same clothes today.
How did people crash their vehicles before cellphones?
Updating my status in the car. Don’t worry, I’m in the passenger seat. Which makes it harder to drive, but fools the cops.
There are 7 trillion nerves in the human body. Some people are capable of getting on every last one of them.
If you hear a roommate having loud sex, a cool thing to do is kick down the door and shout "player 3 has entered the game!"
Sometimes it`s fun to make fun of yourself. Almost as fun as it is to make fun of others.
My love is like a candle, If you forget about me, I`ll burn your frikin house down!
Cats don`t come with instructions, so how is anyone supposed to know you can`t put them in the washing machine.
Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for — in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.
My Status updates are so great people hit the like button twice
gua suka sama kamu