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Alright, I admit it. Sometimes when I wave my hands in the air, I actually do care.
My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy...so I came back drunk.
Remember years ago when we didn`t have facebook and we had to take pictures of our food and get the film developed at the chemist get all your friends round your house and show them what you have been eating ...the good old days
I have no words to describe this day. I do however have a number of obscene gestures that would work.
Is there another word for synonym?
Bad decisions and good stories or good decisions and no stories?
A slug is just a divorced snail.
Never piss off a woman on her period...scratch that...Never piss off a woman, period.
That awkward moment when u start telling a story only to realise no one is listening so you slowly fade out and pretend to have said nothing.
When you drink alcohol you are just borrowing happiness from tomorrow.
Every-time I walk over a sewer grate I look down into it hoping to catch a glimpse of a Ninja Turtle
I don’t have nightmares... I create them for others ;-)
If I ever had to run for my life, I would probably die.
why don`t we get discounts for ringing up our own groceries in self checkout?
I got Mood Poisoning. Must have been something I hate.