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I can alwasy tell when movies do not use real dinosaurs
"Just be yourself" doesn`t work if you suck.
“One man’s trash is another man’s treasure” would be a terrible way to let your child know that they’re adopted.
The worst part about looking for a job is if you`re successful, you end up with a job.
Yawning is our body`s way of saying 20% of battery remaining
I don’t understand the point of lap-dancing clubs. If I wanted a woman to take all my money and sexually frustrate me, I’d stay at home with the wife.
Don`t give me a sec, give me lots of secs.
I did not say you are stupid, I just said that you have bad luck when you`re thinking.
A chain lock on a door is just there to annoy the person who is breaking in to kill you, right?
I hate that part of the morning where I have to get out of bed and participate in real life.
Can you do me a favour? Stand in front of my car, I need to test my brakes.
One day I shall rule the World! Until then, I am going to bed. Good Night :D
I have a black belt in leather
For someone who can`t put on a pair of socks without falling over, I sure do manage to get a lot done every day.
Shoplifting may be wrong in a general sense, but what if, for example, I`m bored of paying for things