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Women don`t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think.
This debt collector was just so surprised I answered my phone that they stuttered and hung-up lmao!!
I just had a conversation with my-self...but it just turned into an argument. I think it`s that time of the month...
Fun Fact: Even though they call it a "man hole", you can shove women and children down it just fine.
So I just saw a donkey crossing the road. The cool thing was he looked both ways before crossing. What a smart a$$.
Guys i did not copy or edit this status of mine.Please believe this is my own idea!
Ironically the only way I`d watch the 50 Shades of Grey movie is if you tied me to a chair and forced me to.
Very productive day today, turd-wise
If life is unfair to everyone, doesn`t that make life fair?
Unless you tripped and smacked your face on the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.
I don’t care how loud I’m laughing, I’m having fun and you’re not.
Every time I`m around my mother in law, I wonder who is running hell in her absence.
I`m not lazy... I`m in energy saving mode.
I don’t know who or what is doing it, but one day I will find the thing that continues to steal one sock and destroy it.
Please be patient...I`m fcuking things up as fast as I can.