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I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
There is no such thing as bad luck, there is good luck and life!
Always be yourself, unless you can be Batman, always be Batman.
I can`t believe The Stones are still doing it after all these years. Someday I want to have a marriage like Fred and Wilma.
I know alcohol isn`t the answer, but it`s my best guess.
Tequila... It`s not just for breakfast anymore...
One time at the beach this guy was swimming in the ocean yelling, "help! shark! help! " I just laughed, I knew that shark was not going to help him.
Even when I’m home alone, I still answer Jeopardy questions out loud.
If A-B-C-D didn’t drag out their part of the Alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to be so rushed.
There’s nothing worse than getting $0.99 back in change.
What is an Amish girls favourite fantasy? Two Mennonite
I’m tired of chasing my dreams, I`m just going to ask them where their going and meet them there later.
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer ... That`s all.
Stealing other people`s statuses on Facebook is called a Facelift.
Filling out a job application. Under "Military Experience" I put that I once went commando for 4 days in a row.