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Well, if you count Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit" then yes, I do like opera.
You can be like "This is a slippery slope" or you can be like "Weeeeeeee!"
If your house doesn`t have house numbers on it, you need to address that situation.
I`m really easy to get along with, once people learn to worship me.
If an officer asks “do you know why I pulled you over?” “Because it’s the only way to get girls to talk to you” is a bad answer, apparently
This town is about as exciting as watching an M&M melt in the sun.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere complement on their mustache...and then she won`t talk to you anymore.
Judging from the bar receipts, ATM withdraws, hand stamps, and the glitter in my car, I now realize I`m a ball of fun when I black out.
Cinderella is my favorite fairy tale about how foot size is the best way to recognize someone.
When i see a person hailing a cab, i run quickly by them and slap them a high five just to boost their enthusiasm!
if truth is what u want...in return alcohol is all I want...
Bored? Text "Our condom broke." to a random number
Wanna ruin a girl’s day? Respond to her next text with “Who is this?”
For many people, "live and learn" is one task too many.
If they gave out awards for laziness, I would have to send somebody to accept it for me.