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If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
Well today I turned 26, not because I wanted to, but only because Facebook limits how many times you can actually change your birth year !
Today is one of those βyeah, Iβm not getting anything doneβ kind of days.
Wow!!, What a day..I volunteered at a soup kitchen, mowed my lawn, went to 2 Birthday parties, ran 6 miles, then told a bunch of lies on Facebook.
"I have to go eat cake now", should be a perfectly valid reason for leaving a social occasion where cake has not been provided.
A recent survey of one person reveals that 100% of me thinks I should leave work early.
βIβ before βEβ especially after βPβ. Mmmm pie
I would run a marathon. If the only 2 bars were 26.2 miles apart and the first one was closed.
Its sad that we live in a world that puts words into the dictionary if enough stupid people use it.
If someone doesn`t return your texts, relax and remember they`re probably just busy not liking you.
Did you know? If you were to watch all of the Saw films, it would take you 666 minutes?
Thumbnail pics. Helping ugly people look hot until you click on them since 1995.
Facebook: Cause why drunk dial one person when you can drunk post the world?
I just saw a disclaimer that said "don`t try this at home", so I tried it at my neighbors house.
Friends who buy you food are friends for life.