Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
7 billion people on the planet and I can only tolerate maybe 10.
Coffee : Starter fluid for the morning impaired.
I wished I loved anything as much as white people love saying "gracias" at Mexican restaurants.
Every once in a while I check up on people I hate to make sure I still hate them… I do.
Do you ever get the feeling that you’re being watched? Because if it’s bothering you, I’ll stop.
I love a woman in uniform. I mean naked.
Was just thinking …. What would the world be like if McDonalds delivered?
All my life I thought air was free… and then I bought a bag of chips. ^^
Some people should use a glue stick for lip balm
You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
Depresso; the feeling you get when you’ve run out of coffee.
It’s getting really annoying how eating makes you gain weight..
Judging by the size of these chicken fingers, that chicken had to be somewhere between 7` to 10` tall.
Admit it, we all have that special someone we`d visit if given a tank to drive for a day
The person next to me just farted.. Does this mean my lungs are full of his poo particles -.-