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And then her mood ring just...exploded
I hate those idiots with those bright halogen lights that are blinding, at least they can see my one finger salute.
You can`t buy happiness, but you can buy ice cream, and that`s kind of the same thing.
Next time you over hear a stranger giving out their number. Text them details of what they are wearing. It`s so fun to watch them freak out!
IM LOST! I`ve gone to look for my self. If u see me, tell me to wait here till I get back.
I f*cking hate you. Hope that clears things up.
When you consider names for your baby, it`s important to try out the middle name in an angry voice.
If you have alphabet fridge magnets, and morals. You probably shouldn`t invite me over.
Non alcoholic beer is like porn movie on a radio
I can`t tell if I actually have free time, or if I`m just forgetting everything...
Nice try horror movies, but everyone in my generation is already terrified to answer their phones
On a scale of 1-10, I give this day a middle finger.
From now on when I accept a friend request I`ll just write on their wall: You belong to me now.
My 5 year old set up the lemonade stand all by himself and, while I`m proud of him, I doubt he`ll make a lot of sales in the backyard.
If you love something, set it free. Maybe not dogs with rabies though. Or killer bees or pretty much any domesticated animal into the wild. Lots of stuff really. Look, the point is don`t love anything.