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Cop: There was no else going anywhere nearly as fast as you! Me: I know. I was winning.
They say in the near future computers will become more intelligent than people, really, the near future? I walk down the street and see girls who struggle with the difference between orange and tanned, guys who have no idea how a belt works, and all of them with less language skills then the average trained chimp. Computers? Hell I’ve got an alarm clock that’s smarter than most of them right now.
www.amish.com. How did this happen?
"You`re as crazy as your mother" is the last thing I remember saying before waking up in intensive care
I have one question about Insanity, "Are we there yet"?
Do you ever wonder how many people’s dreams you have been in?
It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married, right?
"Last man standing" is the winner in most contests, but the runner up in musical chairs.
I really think there should be a separate driving lane for those of us running solely on caffeine and rage.
Advice of the day: Don`t go trick or treating at the bank. They get freaked out. Especially when it`s not Halloween
I’m not surprised you’re having problems I had a bad experience with your reality once too.
Deja Vu: When God thinks something is so funny he has to rewind it to show it to his friends
If ghosts existed, why are they all apparently from the last 100 years or so? Wouldn’t there be evidence of a Neanderthal ghost here and there?
Why is it all the good things in life are either illegal, immoral, impossible, addictive, or fattening?
To all the students who drop out of high school: Remember two things, 1) You tried your best. 2) I don`t like pickles on my BigMac.