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The most common name In China is Chang, correct me if you think it’s Wong.
Jehovah`s witnesses don`t celebrate Halloween. I guess they don`t appreciate random people coming up to their doors.
I had s*x with my friend`s wife last night and now I feel awful. She must have had the flu or something.
Scratching off a lotto ticket before you leave the store is a good way of letting people know that your life isn`t going according to plan.
I always shout "PIZZA`S HERE" so the delivery guy doesn`t think I`m eating two pizzas by myself.
I think Tampax and Hershey`s should get together and offer a super pack....
Whenever I`m out somewhere there is a 99% chance I am thinking about going home and sleeping.
This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness....NO WE WON`T!!
If I get an e-mail from you that says "Sent from my Blackberry" at the bottom, please understand that I`m not going to respond. I can only assume that you sent it in 2006.
Sometimes it`s easy to forget we would all violently murder each other if we couldn`t obtain basic food or water. Have a great day guys.
Marriage counseling - because sometimes your spouse needs to hear from a professional that they are being an a$$
I hate mosquitoes, I mean I know I’m delicious but damn.
I don`t mean to brag, but my posts are enjoyed by well over 20 people worldwide...
I only use the outdoors to get to another indoors.
I wish "You idiot" was an appropriate way to end a work email.