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Ya Know?!?......The number of ways I could care less...... is astounding!
"We have smaller, secret pants that we wear under our normal pants..." - me explaining underwear to aliens.
169 is still a sex position, but with a creepy guy watching.
My Chinese waiter put my food down in front of another white guy who looked nothing like me. I get it now.............Wait, That`s not my waiter!
So no pizza place on Ninja Turtles ever questioned the delivery address being “The Sewer”
I love you more than I hate everyone else.
Thanks to Facebook, rock bottom now has a waiting list.
Do you ever dislike someone so much that you hate when people are nice to them?
Why is it that most nudists are people you don`t want to see naked?
I don’t know what it is but, it’s on sale.
Is it just me or do mirrors look really sexy?
You know you drank too much if you have to wait until your court appearance to find out what the hell happened that night
There would be a lot less people willing to run for public office if the losers were required to pick up all the lawn signs afterwards.
I`ve started an exercise program. I do 20 sit-ups each morning. That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that snooze button so many times.
I’m bored. Anyone need anything avenged?