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I always like to keep a nice photo of myself for my Facebook profile pic because that is the picture that will be splashed all over the news when I finally go off the deep end.
Is a rivalry between two vegetarians still called a beef?
Currently helping my girlfriend look for her chocolates that I ate 5 hours ago...
If you are naughty go to your room, if you wanna be naughty go to mine :)
I love long walks on the beach under the moonlight, poetry, candlelight dinners, and having my a$$ spanked with a fuzzy slipper.
Today is Friday the 13th. Try not to be a teenage girl in her underwear at night at a deserted summer camp today.
If you`re going take a bathroom picture, at least clean it off. I can`t see anything through all the toothpaste.
There are too many people who could ruin my life by posting a screenshot of a text conversation we’ve had.
I think I`ve finally found someone I could spend the rest of my life with, I should probably get out of her closet and introduce myself.
When do you take 5 hr energy? Right when I get off work ..12am!..beer here I come!
You always remember your first Crush. Mine was Orange.
Well, I`m going to take a hot shower. Its like a regular shower, but with me in it.
Have you tried complaining about it for hours?
New marital Status update : Taken, but only for GRANTED
I hate when I`m admiring my good looks from a car`s window reflection and the people inside think I`m staring at them.