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Unfortunately, showing that much cleavage doesn`t fix your face.
All I see on Facebook is penis, orgasm, bang him, bang her, bullwhip, masturbate, porn, tits, and then I read everyone else`s posts..
I would like to say to all my 500+ facebook friends, that i love each and every one of you..except you number 371..your a real a@@hole!!
If by sexy you mean me licking the donut icing off my fingers then yes I can be damn sexy.
I find it ironic that it takes 12 steps to get a beer out of my fridge.
It´s Friday-O-Clock!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I feel moderately intelligent. Other times I have to sing the "ABCs" in my head to remember which letter comes next.
Just think of me as the guy next door. With a telescope.
Make fun of George Bush all you want, but he would have found a way to bomb North Korea before they shut down Hollywood.
I hate it when my kid starts crying in the middle of the night and I have to get up to close the bedroom door.
I don’t think we can get through adulthood without a good sense of humor and a strong middle finger.
It never ceases to amaze me that the little space between the driver’s seat and the center console in my car will fit any object that can possibly be dropped, but will not fit a hand.
My dream job would be the Karma delivery service.
Sometimes all you need is a hug or someone to tell you everything will be ok, or some rough sex or whatever...
Is it just me, or would those movies had been far scarier if they were titled "Monday the 13th"