Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Kids may be a gift, but I like playing with the box it came in.
Lord, grant me the courage to be the person I am under my breath.
More tattoo artists really just need to say "No, I`m not doing that."
I think there are great benefits in remaining strangers.
I met this girl in a club last night, I think she’s a body builder. She just so happened to build hers using chips.
Don`t blame the holidays, you were fat in August.
I love that moment when I`m cruising down the highway listening to country music and I suddenly realize "wait a minute I can change the station!"
The Push Up ice cream company should just buy out Pringles and make all of our lives easier.
Rock bottom is when you get dinner at the same place you buy your gas.
Opinions are like a$$holes: some people make money by posting them on the internet.
Girl are you a University of Phoenix degree because I`m pursuing you online and from my couch
If we aren`t meant to have late night snacks then why is there a light in the fridge.
I hope common sense is the next cool trend.
Today I saw a girl with the word "Anel" on her butt. I was like, woah..it`s supposed to say "Anal"..it`s spelled wrong then I realized it was supposed to say "Angel". The G was stuck in her a$$crack
I just hope people who say "Jesus is my co-pilot" realize he`s a 1st century carpenter with no time in a flight simulator.