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It’s always awkward the first time you hold hands with someone because they usually want to know who you are and why you just grabbed them.
I am so thankful there is no alert that tells someone how many times I have enlarged their profile pics.
Relax,,, We`re all crazy.. It`s not a competition.
The sooner you fall behind the more time you´ll have to catch up.
Technology is outpacing my ability to come up with convincing lies that I didn`t get your message.
I really thought 2015 had potential to be “my year” but we’re 2 months in and that ship has sailed so I’ll try again for 2016.
If tit for tat doesn`t mean flashing guys with tattoos, than I`ve been doing it wrong this whole time.
Seems like I can`t go anywhere in my house without somebody recognizing me.
Its sad that we live in a world that puts words into the dictionary if enough stupid people use it.
IMPORTANT REMINDER: Sunday is Mother`s Day, which means Facebook is gonna be annoying as crap...
I slept and woke up. (ok, lately this has become a major accomplishment in my life)
I`m the opposite of psychic. I don`t even know what I`m thinking! ;)
I don`t know what I would do without Facebook, but I`m sure it would be something more productive
There are 2 kinds of people I can’t stand: Nosy people, and people who won’t tell me what in the hell is going on.
My kid threatened to hold her breath until I gave her dessert. She`s now passed out on the kitchen floor. I don`t negotiate with terrorists!!