Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Really had my heart set on waking up rich today.
Why am I single? Answer me. . . ANSWER ME YOU STUPID CATS!!!
Those awkward moments when you catch yourself feeling frustrated with your kids for being just like you....
I`m pretty sure the whole "ladies first" thing was created by a guy just to check out girls butts.
loves driving down the road and just waving at random people like you know them!:D
Studies confirm that smoking withdrawal (for me) can be fatal (for you).
There is no number for what just happened in that bathroom.
My pants are 75% off.
No great story started with someone drinking water.
Billion dollar idea: A phone that charges using body fat!
Clearly, you are a person with an open mind. I can feel the breeze from here.
Your pants say yoga but your a$$ says McDonalds!!
People should have to pass an IQ test to use the self-checkout section.
Me: Mom...Dad. I`ve decided to live on my own from now on. Parents: ok, cool. Me: Your luggage is outside
I can keep a secret… It’s all the other people I tell it to who can’t.