Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Every time i see a person kneeling over tying their shoe, i run up behind them and hop over them to try and get a game of leapfrog going.
I don`t think my blind date was blind, she read the menu and caught the basketball I threw at her
I don’t understand how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living.
My wife asked me if I knew her favorite flower was. Apparently "Gold Medal All Purpose" was not the correct response
My friend sent his wedding invitation from Facebook Event. I sent him a gift from Farmville.
I wonder if clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look. That one is shaped like an idiot
I like when videogames limit how many things you can hold. "You have 100 items in an invisible bag. Carrying another would be unrealistic"
United Airlines.... Board as Doctor, leave as patient.
ROFL!!….. LOL jk i’m still in my chair.
People with the loudest car audio systems usually have the worst taste in music.
If everybody was consistently as determined as they are when they carry all groceries in one trip, this world would be in a better place.
It`s amazing how much us guys complain about women and then fully trust them with our pen!ses in their mouth.
Thanks to yesterday`s chili, I can definitively tell you that there are 242 tiles in this bathroom stall.
Kinda hard to believe not a single mutant at professor Xavier’s school had the power to heal a dude’s legs.
Sometimes I ask myself why do I stay up so late? Then I tell myself it`s none of my damn business.