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My wife even says "NO" in her sleep. The force is strong with this one.
Tonight’s forecast. Mostly drunk with a slight chance of passing out.
Well, if you count Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit" then yes, I do like opera.
this website used to be full of funny statuses. Then the 8-year olds came in.
So many feelings today. Mostly hunger.
Mothers never really understand the irony of calling their children "come here you son of a bitch"
I grew up in a town where the population never changed… Every time a girl got pregnant, a guy left town
If the shoe fits, wear it. Unless they`re not yours. But you can still were them. It`s just a road test, after all.
Have you guys seen the new documentary about white trash? I only saw the trailer.
Save electricity! Would you like it if someone turned you on and then left?
Apologising does not mean you are wrong and the other person is right, it just means you value your relationship more than your ego.
The only thing worse than a cold toilet seat is a warm one.
Gently placing your finger on someone’s lips and saying, “Shh, not another word,” is super romantic but cops don’t seem to think so.
Without coffee, I’m just a really tall 2 year old.
Relationship Tip for men: When a woman says, "Correct me if I`m wrong but...."Don`t do it!! It`s a trap!! DO NOT, I repeat, do not correct that woman!!!