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Oh my gosh! It`s a Hot Wheels car! Something you never want to hear during a prostate exam.
Hey parents with teenagers, the bottle of vodka in your liquor cabinet is water.
I’m on that new diet where you eat everything and hope for a miracle!
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
My wife went home to visit her mother today. Or as I refer to it. Her “bitch refresher course”.
Go ahead caller 9!!
Why non-smokers don`t take bubble blowing breaks is beyond me
In a new study women with large a$$es live longer………the men who tell them live distinctively shorter lives.
If someone says “you’re funny” instead of laughing, you’re not.
Amazing how many people just stroll into tattoo parlors and say "Give me the dumbest thing you can think of."
I`m optimistic that within my lifetime it will become acceptable to wear your underwear to the supermarket.
LOQ "Laugh Out Quietly" because LOL is giving me a headache
Had a great time watching the family oriented PG rated Shrek with my grandson last night... until he asked why a Donkey would have sex with a Dragon.
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous. I see a lot of new faces in the room this week and I`m very disappointed with all of you.
For many people, "live and learn" is one task too many.