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Jimmy is short for James? This is where I think English is stupid. They have the same number of letters. Do they even know what short means?
Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, please take them off.
Winter needs to calm the f*ck down
This town has more white trash in it than a dumpster behind a paper plate factory
I`ve been knocking for ten minutes. Don`t people answer their bathroom windows anymore?
Does it count as saving someone`s life if you just refrain from killing them?
No toilet paper.. goodbye socks
A lot of attractive people are like nice cars with the check engine light on.
Happy 15th birthday google, 3 more years and you will be able to search for adult sites legally
I`d like to give you a big thumb`s-up. But I`m afraid that would be the wrong finger.
The last breasts I touched belonged to a dead chicken.
What I lack in vocabulary, I make up for in…you know...stuff...and...things...
Patiently waiting for the Prozac to kick in so I can start my day....Ok, Maybe NOT patiently!
My neighbor put the box his fridge came in on the curb for trash pickup. Guess who has a new fort!
I don`t drink to feel better about myself. I drink to feel better about being with you