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Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain.
Imagine how bad it would be if everyone could hear what you were thinking.
I let a girl go through my phone recently so a colonoscopy really doesn’t scare me anymore.
Facebook prank #23 Go in everynight and change your birthday to the next day...then see how long it takes for people to catch on....
Follow your dreams. Unless it’s a person. ..apparently they call THAT stalking.
I hate when my mom tells people I`m 503 months old.
People must stop questioning my sanity, it wont answer them.
My new year`s resolution is to stop making new year`s resolutions.
I`m an accident looking for a place to happen!
A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in.
An egg salad is really just a chicken salad that is really underdone.
I like to walk up to strangers and ask, "Would you take a photo of me?" If they say yes I hand them a photo of me and walk away.
BOOK FACT: If you took every book at Barnes and Noble and laid them end to end you get thrown out by security and banned from returning.
The majority of life`s greatest lessons are learned while observing your drunk friends.
I don´t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.