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Coffee is gods way of saying "go ahead get trashed on a weeknight, I`ve got your back"
Calm down! I`m not officially late until I actually get there.
I think my "check engine" light has finally burned out. So that`s good.
Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible.
Hangman was my favorite childhood learning game that promoted hanging someone for a wrong answer.
It`s all fun and games...unless there`s cookies, then it`s serious
My ex has had a really hard time moving on. From what I can tell through his blinds, he is currently eating (something we always did)
I know the light has changed twice people but I`m playing air drums until Moby Dick is over...sit back and enjoy the show please...
If I owned a copy shop, I’d only hire identical twins to work there.
It’s too bad that it’s easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
NO, I didn’t say you WERE stupid. I said, you ARE stupid. There is nothing past tense about it.
My friend won a trip to China. He´s out there now... trying to win a trip back.
I had lunch with a chess player yesterday. It took him 20 minutes to pass the salt.
I have blank business cards I hand out and call them my “none of your business” cards.
I don`t like people who hate certain group of people. But I get along very well with people who hate everybody equally.