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You can stop lifting weights now; it’s actually your personality that nobody likes.
I have a new rule: No one is allowed to talk to me for a minimum of 24 hours after I wake up.
To all them girls who go out , looking sexy as hell but have boyfriends.......Please continue to do so when you`re married.
You can test my patience all you want, but I’m never going to pass.
I`m 5`5" and a HALF. I think men should be pretty impressed that I consider half inches very important when measuring things.
You can tell a lot about a woman by the way she pours gasoline around your car.
So I was thinking... since the kids get the Easter bunny, why shouldn`t I expect a visit from a Playboy bunny today?
Takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do ...
"I know im the best driver on the road" thinks every guy.
I need my coffee before I start pretending to work.
Somehow, hitting the "end call" button on the cell phone just doesn`t feel nearly as good as the old days when you could slam the phone down on somebody.
You call it camping. I call it getting drunk with insects.
I hope common sense is the next cool trend.
First you told me to be myself now you`re telling to me not be an idiot. Make up your mind woman!
I didn`t see anyone important today, so I`ll probably wear these same clothes tomorrow.