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Jerry: Tom, you are a genius!.. Tom: Yeah, I am called that a lot... Jerry: What? Genius?... Tom: No, `Tom`
I`m sticking to my guns ... I really should have washed my hands after I ate.
Your day sucked, huh? I`m sure Facebook would love to hear about it.
When one door closes and another one opens, it`s time to pack up and leave because your house is clearly haunted.
Some people just lack the ability to realize that everyone in the room wants them to shut up.
Apparently, "Step up your game" isn`t the correct response when your neighbour brings over fresh cookies, and your wife asks how they are.
I`m high as a kite! Let me rephrase that: I`m stuck in a tree.
I`m at the facebook saloon, drinking all night long
Can you find the the mistake? 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10. Click Funny if you did..
I was all ears until you said something that sounded like advice.
I swear, if one more person calls me an alcoholic they are getting a high five too.
Tequila is Spanish for Iām open to waking up anywhere.
If you fall, I`ll be there - Floor
Sign in a grocery store: Take lettuce from top of stack, or heads will roll!
I have an inferiority complex,,,,,, but it isn`t a very good one.