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Welcome to my Facebook wall. Straight jackets are on your left, meds are on the table, and if you hurry, you can still get a seat in group therapy . . . have fun!
Corn mazes are great because how often does one get to experience the feeling of being trapped by corn
My mom put shredded carrots in our Jello, so don`t tell me about your rough childhood.
So, basically Alexa is just some know-it-all with no actual job skills.
When i am bored, i like parking along side the xpressway stick a hair dryer out the window, and watch everyone slam on their brakes.
The amount of people who confuse "to" and "too" is amazing two me.
If love is blind....why is lingerie so popular?
I have to hand it to people who lead a double life ... I can barely handle the one I have.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
If you have trouble getting your children`s attention, just sit down and look comfortable.
ATTENTION LADIES: I will now be downgrading expectations from someone I can love to someone I can tolerate. Act now while this amazing deal still lasts!
Why isn’t the default for online shopping “view all”? Who likes to skip through 20 pages of only 12 items…
They don`t say "Get down Mr. President" anymore. Now they just shout, "Donald Duck!"
GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
*Hears a joke about a chocolate bar* *Snickers*