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Thanks to this huge spider web I just walked into, we can now add the neighbors to the list of people that have seen me naked.
Just drove past the house where I lost my virginity. There wasn`t even a plaque or anything. Pretty ridiculous if you ask me.
I like surprises. Not the `finger in my a$$ without permission` kind, but flowers are always nice.
Dyslexics of the world.. UNTIE!
Social networking sites is proof that people should not be allowed to name themselves
its not the up`s and down`s that bring you down...its the jerks!!
I sent that "Ancestry " site some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over
It`s time to wave goodbye to winter. Guess what finger I`ll be using?
If practice makes perfect, one day I will make the perfect mistake.
Respect your parents, they pay for your internet.
I wish I loved anything as much as rappers love female dogs and gardening tools.
The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.
If a group of midgets performed the YMCA song, it is to be considered that they did it in lowercase?
Alcohol does not make you fat. It makes you lean. Mostly against walls, tables, chairs, bars, floors & occasionally, weirdos ..
:): The Bipolar smiley face