Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs.
Gas prices are a lot like girls: We just wish they would go down.
Oh the pranks I would pull if I were invisible
Why don`t we wait for life on other planets to find us? Why do we have to do all the work?
My dog can`t hear me yelling at him to stop chasing squirrels, but he can hear a damn cheese wrapper from 500 miles away
Who decided that the abbreviation for pound should be two letters not in the word?
How do American chickens cross the road? In a bucket.
I feel sorry for people who don`t have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.
No Shirt No Shoes No Service. What about pants?
I wouldn’t say your ugly, you are just beautichallenged.
Why is it when I flush the toilet in the middle of the night, I have a feeling I woke up the entire neighbourhood?
Last night I got so drunk I blacked out for two hours, but then I realized I’d just put my hoodie on backwards
The club sandwich, for when a knuckle sandwich just isn`t enough...
Don`t let anyone call you an "underachiever". If they knew you, they`d know how amazing it is that you`ve managed to accomplish anything.
Sorry, I didn’t mean to text you a graphic description of my explosive diarrhea. Stupid autocorrect.