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I tend to say “I don’t know” when I’m too lazy to think.
If I ignored you any harder, we`d be married.
Dear World, Stop saying "twerk."
*breaking news music plays* Last thought of the night: Why is now everyone talkin` bout "twerkin`"? Man, that shyt been `round since the days of Hammer pants and spandex shorts!!!!
Facebook has suggested that I POKE you.
"How many people work at your company?" About half of them.
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.
If watching the big-screen TV with your pants off and a bag of Doritos is wrong, then they shouldn`t have couches at this Best Buy.
Stress balls work best when you shove them down somebody`s throat.
I DON`T HATE YOU,I`M JUST NOT NECESSARILY EXCITED ABOUT YOUR EXISTENCE!
ok ladies quick question?,say a guy wanted to wear a thong does he tuck shirt in or out? Asking for a friend.
This woman just flipped me off and I couldn`t agree more.
It seems like the ‘L’ in my luck has been replaced with an ‘F’.
Experience with women has taught me that Jack was most likely pushed down the hill.
If your pet has its own FB page, it might be time for a reality check...