Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I never meant to be so cold, I never meant to be so cold. - Mother nature
they say "money cant buy happiness" but money pays for my internet connection and my vodka so im thinking maybe "they" are wrong
I love asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because I`m still looking for ideas.
Let`s face it. Seeing a camel toe in leopard print tights at Walmart is probably the closest any of us will ever get to going on an African safari.
I don`t mind being wrong, as long as nobody knows.
I know the voices ain`t really, but man, do they ever come up with some great ideas.
Happy Halloween… may all of your skeletons stay in the closet where they belong!
I never fail to win at Rock, Paper, Scissors when I pick up the other person and throw them out the window.
It’s amazing how everyone cries for free speech until someone says something that they don’t like.
It’s been “one of those days” for like 3 years now.
I really don`t know what the big deal is about Black Friday. I black out every Friday....
I’ve taken off my pants in most malls that I’ve been to.
Anyone else pretend to work all day while thinking about big boobs instead?
Whenever I want a klondike bar I just pay for it.
No, I CAN’T believe how early it’s getting dark. After 4 billion years of this happening I was sure this would be the year it didn’t.