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Was building a website for women drivers ... Bloody thing kept crashing.
That`s not chapstick in my front pocket.
Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.
How do I disable the autocorrect function on my wife?
Liking something on Facebook instead of commenting is like nodding at someone in an elevator instead of saying hello.
If I owned an auto collision shop, I’d name it “Auto Correct.”
I bet wrecking ball operators are some of the happiest people in the world.
Oh honey, you`re not pretty enough to be that stupid
A Relationship is like poker, if you don`t have a partner you better have a good hand.
I`m not saying i hate you but if you were on fire and i had water i would drink it
If we can put a satellite in orbit around a comet 4 billion miles away, perhaps someday we can put a working wireless printer in my office.
I just read that ciggarettes cause rectal cancer, I should me fine, I was going to put them in my mouth anyway..
Went by the bank today and the female teller was flirting with me which was weird considering she saw my account balance.
People go to the bar hoping for 2 things...to get hammered or to get nailed.
If you’re telling me to relax, it’s probably your fault that I’m not.