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"How much for the man cave?" "Sir that`s a doghouse." "Can you install cable?"
Can you imagine the reactions 25 years ago if you showed someone a photo album of pictures you took of yourself in the bathroom?
You can`t find happiness at the bottom of a beer ... Well no kidding, who is happy when their beer runs out?
Roman Numerals...what are they good IV?
can be sympathetic, empathetic, compassionate, welcoming, loyal, trust-worthy, forgiving, understanding, and giving. But not to today!
Some days, I think that Dexter dude has the right idea.
One day you will meet someone so amazing in every way who will want absolutely nothing to do with you.
North Korea no!, really, go home! now you are really drunk!
I may be delusional but at least I`m going to Mars in November.
First Rule of Camping: Put up the tent before you start drinking.
The best thing about smartphones is that you don`t have to refold maps anymore.
They always say "love makes the world go around"... They spelled beer wrong.
I sometimes get road rage just pushing a shopping cart though a grocery store!
I feel that being a smarta$$ is my duty. The pay sucks, but the work is very rewarding.
I fight evil wherever it may be ... except in dark, scary places.