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Huge spoiler here ... Did you know Dave is actually NOT the real father of Alvin, Simon, and Theodore.
Im at a beer tasting today..so far they all taste the same out of this case...well done Budweiser...well done!!
Remember the good old days when making the “duck face” involved 2 Pringles?
One day when I was at the beach there was a guy in the ocean yelling, "Shark! Help!" And I just laughed. I knew that shark wasn`t going to help him.
Happiness, is just a liquor store away.
You have got to have worse hand-eye coordination than a lama on crack
The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they take things so literally.
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer
People who copy and paste jokes from other’s status messages are idiots…A few seconds ago • Like • Comment
It’s what’s on the inside that counts, unless you’re talking about one of those hollow chocolate bunnies.
Somebody needs to teach opportunity how to use a doorbell.
If only mosquitoes sucked fat, instead of blood.
I`m a firm believer that if something takes 10 minutes to cook on 200 degrees then it should only take 5 minutes to cook on 400 degrees
Black holes must be where God divided by zero.
is ready to have one too many!