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Ever had sex while camping!? It`s intents!
Eggnog is perfect for when you feel like drinking a glass of pancake batter.
Urban Dictionary has saved me from asking so many awkward questions.
What Meatloaf wouldn`t do for love I would probably do for a six pack.
This year for Lent I`m giving up hanging out with all the people who gave up drinking for Lent.
Apparently putting Alka-Seltzer in my mouth while getting baptized and pretending I’m being possessed by the devil is not funny.
There’s been over 30 billion messages posted on Facebook, and yet most of us have never even talked to our neighbors.
Behind every beautiful woman, is a beautiful behind.
Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
Not having any friends means I`m always the pretty one.
Doctors waiting room needs some music. And better lighting. And more women. And a pole in the middle of the room. And a buffet.
How do some people manage to sit on it and talk out of it at the same time?
Guys, if a girl invites you upstairs for "coffee," first make sure she has coffee, you don`t want to get up there and there`s no coffee.
I don`t get women. Also, I don`t understand them.
going to mcdonalds for a salad is like going to a brothel for a hug