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Life is too short to be angry and hold grudges. Just slap them in the face and move on!
I have an awesome idea, but first I`ll need a zebra, bungee cords, jello, and a partner in crime. Any takers?
I`ve come to terms with the fact that I will never experience leftover pizza.
The fox says you need to stop.
No one in my family has ever actually used the Olive Garden gift card. We just keep passing it down from generation to generation.
Apparently there is no age limit on ignorance.
Pirates that used X to mark the spot were stupid. If they had used a G, nobody would ever have found their treasure.
There`s something I need to get off my chest: Darned Cheetos crumbs.
OMG, you guys, there`s a button on this stove that says "Stop Time". Should I press it??
I just saw a guy take a bite of Kit Kat bar without breaking it apart first! Sir, we live in a society with rules, please adhere to them.
I don`t need drugs to have a good time, I need them to focus, avoid depression, endure winter, fall asleep, and controll my high blood pressure
Everyone picks their nose at some point, it`s what you choose to do next that defines who you are as a person.
If a post is really good you will read it twice. if a post is really good you will read it twice.
Anyone going to stare at their phones anywhere cool this weekend?
Forget Klondike, you should see what I`d do for an open bar.