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I’m in a long distance relationship. Sure, some people refer to it as a restraining order, but still.
"Kids are great when you need help around the house." - People who don`t have kids
I always advise people never to give advice.
“I” before “E” especially after “P”. Mmmm pie
Walmart is one store where it is truly acceptable to shop in your pajamas.
Let me be honest, I dont even walk a mile in my own shoes.
My Ex updated her status to "standing on the edge of a cliff" So I "poked" her!
Hi everyone! Welcome to AA. This is a "judgment free" zone...unless we`re talking about Janice who ate all the cookies last week.
Well, just 8 more hours of Facebook and I can go back to bed. *phew*
Don’t compare yourself to others, that’s when you start to lose confidence in yourself.
You ever think that maybe the reason geese are always honking is because they`re flying too close together?
You can tell how old someone is by what part of the chex mix is their favorite.
And I was like “No, Coke is NOT ok. I wanted a Pepsi.” And she was all “Sir, 911 should only be dialed for real emergencies.”
Be Poor... Its Cheaper :)
Handy tip for new parents : Wake up your baby by gently resting your head on a pillow.