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At least my motivation gets to sleep in.
"Ramen." - Scooby Doo finishing a prayer.
Spilling a full beer you paid for is the adult equivalent of letting go of a balloon.
I just wanted you all to know that I`m leaving Facebook. The ride has been a blast and I`ve made a ton of friends. Your humor and wit is amazing. I`ll miss all of u, but I`ve decided I need to spend more time with my family...so see you after breakfast!!
Taco Bell drive-thru should have a “I’m Feeling Lucky” button.
I don’t really forgive people I just pretend like it`s okay and wait for my opportunity to destroy them.
Sure you can try and tell me what to do. Or you can keep your teeth.
Blood moon, shooting stars....I gotta move to a safer galaxy
I want to follow my dream, but i dont want to look like a stalker
Just read an article about a new species of spider in Sri Lanka that is the size of an average human`s face. In an unrelated matter, I have decided to NEVER visit Sri Lanka.
When your world is falling apart, when it seems like things can`t get any worse, please remember...I don`t give a s$it.
Even hoarders throw their chapstick away if someone else uses it.
I wonder if strippers have nightmares about accidentally going to work fully clothed?
It takes about 2.9 seconds for me to go from “this is the best day ever” to “I want to stab every person on planet Earth.”
I don´t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.