Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Society has put an unnecessary amount of effort into the advancement of yogurt.
I wish I could feel as happy as an adult, as I felt as a kid when the teacher wheeled in the TV during class
I ate cereal for dinner because I do what I want. I`m an adult. Oh did I say adult? I meant poor. It`s because I`m poor.
They say love is in every corner... my life must be a f*cking circle!
Talked to someone in person today....what a pain in the a$$ that was!
The parent-teacher conference is going great. They have no idea I’m not the teacher.
Relationships would be easier if people came with a “Clear History” button.
A man in front of me at Walmart is buying a pregnancy test. I bet this is the one time in his life he wishes she had sent him for tampons!
Like if you remember the correlation between a pencil and a cassette tape ...
Peeing in the sink is a great time saver: no lifting the seat, no flush, sink is right there to wash hands jk I don`t wash my hands.
Posting inspirational quotes online is the first sign to depression.
Follow your dreams. Unless it’s a person ... apparently they call that stalking.
NyQuil is great. I love the way it comes with it´s own shot glass
People go to the bar hoping for 2 things...to get hammered or to get nailed.
Its Friday ... my body is in for a much-needed drinking session