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Sometimes I get road rage standing in lines.
You can`t find happiness at the bottom of a beer ... Well no kidding, who is happy when their beer runs out.
Sometimes, late at night in WalMart, I switch up all the color tubes in the hair dye kits.
Nothing like calling off work and watching porn all morning.
What`s the right age to stop running naked from the bedroom to the bathroom?
I really shouldn`t have driven home from the bar last night. Especially since I walked there.
I`m convinced some people got married just so they could gripe about being married...
Time is precious ... waste it wisely!
Best grilled cheese ever!! All I did was add a hamburger patty.
that annoying manager who thinks they are god ... you are not ... you are a douche box
How much Hershey`s Chocolate Syrup can I add before it`s really not a SlimFast shake anymore?
Whenever I drive past the psychic’s empty parking lot, I think, if I was psychic I would only be open on the days I knew people were coming.
Sorry I poked you all over your body, but I was just looking for the off button.
Will someone please tell ugly girls with small boobs that their opioion doesnt really matter.
Ok Brazil, this would be a time when it`s ok to bite an opponent.