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No matter how busy a guy is, he can always take out a moment from his busy life to just stop and stare at a beautiful girl.
If you are having anxiety over something you`ve said or done, just remember that 90% of the world only cares what you look like.
Seriously, how can it be considered stealing when my neighbor’s WiFi signal was trespassing in MY house? I’m the victim here!!
Screw you, regular cars that look like police cars. Also vice versa.
Went to the virgin islands, now they are just the islands.
Sometimes you`ve got to ask yourself: `Why am I talking to myself?`
A new study found that legalizing marijuana in Colorado has created more than 10,000 jobs...by keeping Taco Bell open 24 hours.
Remember the good ole days when we had to get out of bed to use the Internet.
I still remember when everyone wanted their phone to be smaller. Now that we can watch porn on them, everyone wants them bigger.
Can`t believe people still say "pot" it`s not the 70s anymore we call it "saucepan" now
I once shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.
I haven`t owned a watch for I don`t know how long.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody`s there to appreciate it.
I mixed Taco Bell sauce into my Ramen Noodles, It tastes exactly like poverty.
I bet if you asked a one-eyed person, they`d tell you it really WAS all fun and games up until that point.