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A wise man once said nothing.
Feeling tired as you struggle to get through the day? There`s a nap for that.
I`d rather be in a relationship where no one wears the pants.
If you ever need anything please don`t hesitate to ask someone else first.
How to break up with someone: You: Your ex is attractive. Partner: Which one? You: ME. You: BYEEEE
I think Tampax and Hershey`s should get together and offer a super pack....
Congrats on winning an argument with your woman...... Your prize is a night on the couch.
I`m not saying that I`ve been online too long, I`m just saying that when I close my eyes I scroll through my thoughts
Some people should use a glue stick instead of chap stick.
When I see a tire swing swaying gently in the breeze, I like to believe its daydreaming about life on the open road.
I`m a very modest person, mostly because I`m awesome.
I looked up "thesaurus" in my thesaurus and it says "Don`t be a smart-ass".
"American Pie" ruined it for any kid that actually does have an amazing story from band camp.
Why is it when I flush the toilet in the middle of the night, I have a feeling I woke up the entire neighbourhood?
take a left on crazy, keep going until you hit insane. Follow that down to lunatic, turn right on insomnia, way past retarded and there you are @ my place!