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Ever had sex while camping!? It`s intents!
Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will only be jingling "part" of the way this year, as usual ur patience is appreciated.
The best part about living by myself is not having to explain why i fell asleep on the kitchen counter… naked… again..
It must be annoying for nudists when they have to clean their glasses
The guy who invented wet t-shirt contests probably has no idea that shirts can just be taken off.
There`s no law against twerking...but apparently it`s still frowned upon during jury duty.
I can`t be trusted with your alphabet magnets.
You know you`re getting old when cops make you feel safe instead of nervous.
When I go to the gas station I always get two kinds of drinks so it appears I actually have a friend..I think they`re catching on though.
Well after 6 months of my girlfriend nagging, I finally did it, I lost 120lbs ... I`m sure gonna miss her.
The dollar store needs to go ahead and open up a few gas stations.
Thinking of opening a bar right next to a gym and call it “Decisions, Decisions”.
The cop at your front door is never a stripper when you want them to be.
Ain`t no sunshine when she`s gone..... or sandwiches.... Ain`t no sandwiches either.
I’m going back to sleep. I refuse to give up on my dreams that easily.