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I know I have a long way to go but look at how far I`ve come.
Starting an international incident is number one on my bucket list.
To trick people into thinking I understand things at a museum I stand in front of every painting and silently count to twenty.
Sometimes I wish I was full of pizza instead of emotions.
You’re the reason I wake up everyday... Just kidding I have a job!!
Ah Friday...my second favorite "F" word!
good boys go to heaven bad boys go every where
Roman Numerals...what are they good IV?
You know those orange cones they put on the highway for you to knock down? I just beat my high score last night!
I’m pretty much always down for a snack.
Don`t you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.
Some people are like rain clouds. Once they f*ck off, it`s a beautiful day.
If you ever feel sad remember that there’s a number you can call and a pizza will be there in 30 minutes.
All i wanna know is how this website knew my name is Guest?
Whenever I want a klondike bar I just pay for it.